EVERYTHING IS SWEATY & ill; the sweater wearing down on my ribcage in a tight-lipped noose; a hoof on the soft tendon of neck; kissing its strung veins into hickeys; tight fists on pearls; metal clanging into litany as the church howls for God’s rest; the eyeliner on my lids sagging into age, scraping the skin with desperate claws; the meat around bones sloughs off; and everything is sweaty & naked; a crotchless Jesus walking in heels and calling it McQueen; where are the Armadillo heels and the crucifix nailed on my tongue like septum rings?; romance is dead, the cynics shout, but the world believes that summer is just coming, and everyone is feeling hedonistic; pop songs from the radio croak about sex, love, heartbreak, capitalism, and package it to the butcher shop; the bacon around their message is serrated into oil; and again into sex; love; heartbreak; and capitalism; somewhere, between my legs is a half-formed thing; a hunyango; shapeshifting into the might of my Frankenbody; willing it to become a troll that grows its fangs in gold; so when it bites, there is glitter against the carcass; and everyone would laugh about the grotesque malfunction of my sex; your mother reminds you that there is God; so where is she, i ask; my mother doesn’t answer this but leaves a searing mark on my face; and that enough was a punctuation; the wallpaper walls in my room smell like saprotrophic decay; the smell of old people gritting their teeth through their pending death; and everything is sweaty & vignetted; aestheticized pain crawling meth to bones; some days feel so faux; the veneer yellowing on its edges; the fire is curling into a smirk; and the world watches my body abscond into the abandon; they say the town is off these days; radioactive towers bulging out serpentine eyes to scan the entire faces of depression; and when it happened, the sheep didn’t bleat, they all grew legs out of their breasts and crawled into the city; meanwhile, somewhere against the heat, the mirror is staring at me, while my breasts poke out like alien machine; sprouting poetry about bodies; the asymmetric nipples measure my worth; my spine plating into scales; as I mermaid into the farmhouse party where everything is sweaty & suffocating at last; the drinks swerve around neon hands; planets orbiting their own axis; skin melding into leather; leather melding into sequins; sequins melding into boy-hounds; boy-hounds melding into coquette bras; coquette bras melding into caked faces of Barbies, Bratz, and dolls; and every girl part melds around me like a chromatic smear; and perhaps, this is the point; knowing that the world one day is gonna stop; and your legs will be tangled to someone else’s; your hair wired into the barbed tangles of another; your eyes closed and caved into the clavicle of a stranger; your bones shifting into a squeaking bird around someone’s arms branching into nests; and despite the meteor spearing forward, despite the world sipping its tequila as it lazes in the darkness; your body seeps in the ancestral comfort of being close to someone’s heat; your body is less alone when it is snagged to someone else’s fishnet; your body becomes one with all the lonely nihilists; your body hungers; your body churns; your body sizzles; with what?; an intimacy so feral; that only animals can sniff it from a mile away; and that dog-teeth buried inside your stomach; is an acid that will burn you forever; into feeling; so the night watches everything; because everything is sweaty & it is a party; your body is Christ-figure, and Jesus is dancing with you; in the stale barn; the drinks taste like pee; the boys are manhood ribboned into cheese; the girls are secretly hawks; the birds outside are girls; the sheep sleeping are boys ready for slaughter; the queers are escaping into somewhere; and this world is yours; for once; the eyeliner inks out; the strap of your bra is a tentacle of girlhood; the lace on your crotch reminds you that it is sick being a girl; and maybe, it is ugly; maybe there’s no poetry to it; but yes; it is now; and now is a comma that will never end;
